Founder's Day simply never fails

Founder's Day never fails to make people like me go depressed. You see, the main part of Founder's Day lies only in the prize-giving ceremony, and even dignitaries like Mr. K Shanmugan (Singapore's Law Minister) who came over to grace the ceremony was hardly given any notice.

Well I admit I was giving him some notice, since he was the only other person who didn't had this effect of putting me to shame with my lack of awards. As with the other people around me.

Then there were those who went for multiple appearance, people like Barry Tng, Nigel Fong, Paul Tern. Even Theophilus Kwek was on the list! Which isn't much of a surprise.

So Mr. Shanmugan started off with some jokes to lighten the mood, which was already filled with much festivity considering how we sang the Founder's Day song with much aplomb and with heartiness. And then there was the competition at the end between the JC1 Rafflesians and the Sec 4 Rafflesians, where they sang their batch song, and we started with ours.

Not criminal or anything, and all done in the name of good fun - we work hard and play hard. And today was officially the last day of school leading to the June holidays! Here's how Jonathan Shin will spend his holidays:

1) Practise piano with laser-beam accuracy (as what Dr Hecht said when he used to practise)
2) Complete all overdue assignments
3) Go to social gatherings and class parties
4) Complete all due assignments


So here I am, completing my English portfolio. I've yet to complete (read: complete, not start) my English argumentative essay, of which I have managed to maintain the same level of ENTHUSIASM since I first heard of this project.

Which is good.

5) Complete my RE and do the recording for it by end of June

Watching movies of the 80s are amusing. The fight scenes are littered with yells and screams, unneccesary moves and unneccesary speech. And then we have the stereotypes of the 80s, where the terrorists were the Arabs and they talked in an Arab accent. The actors didn't do a good job portraying the terrorists though - some of the raw emotions just don't come out. Well if you're going for pure raw then I suggest Lust, Caution might be the correct movie.

Unfortunately the director wasn't Ang Lee, and this movie was a B-flick, so the choreographing was pretty bad and the photography too. And after all this rambling, you would definitely be wondering what this movie's about.

It's Air Marshal.

There are so many criticisms of this movie that I have to get a new printer to print out the waiting numbers. Let's take for example the CGI graphics of the plane itself. Well since the plane's being hijacked, we need to show exteriors of the plane. And it totally sucked, because it was so obviously CGI and in fact blatantly trying to tell us that directors put this computer model in while they were on Tiger Beer. And they didn't bother to check whether it would turn out ok.

And then the terrorists in the plane seem to pop out from nowhere. I could easily count more than half a dozen terrorists. Now tell me which organization would bother to put so many terrorists in one plane...Don't they know that one should not put all their eggs in one basket?

Wouldn't bother to rate it unless someone treats me to an ice-cream. And a bottle of abalone.

Then again we'll have to be realistic and note that this movie was made with a budget - not everyone is as rich as I am. With movies made with THAT kind of money, it's got to be a movie you catch while you realise you've all the time in the world. Which I don't have! But I watched it anyway.

Is this why people like Nigel Fong and Barry Tng have their own places on the stage? Their discipline? I don't think so. I just like to think they naturally have a gift for mathematics or science, and they work towards honing that skill. If only. If only Raffles Institution had an award for just practical. Then again music is a humanities subject - it consists of geography, literature, history and art.

Simply excelling in one department isn't good enough to book a place on stage with Mr. Shanmugan!

Simply excelling in one department of music isn't healthy!

Simply excelling in one department of music...makes me depressed.

Not really though. It works to be an optimist!

quiz

The Dante's Inferno Test has sent you to Purgatory!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very High
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	High
Level 2 (Lustful)	Moderate
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Very Low
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Very Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Very Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very Low
Level 7 (Violent)	Low
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Moderate
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Very Low

Take the Dante Inferno Hell Test

Greed:	Very Low
Gluttony:	Medium
Wrath:	Low
Sloth:	Very Low
Envy:	Very Low
Lust:	Low
Pride:	Medium

The Seven Deadly Sins Quiz on 4degreez.com


Oh in case anyone was thinking what the last post was about, it was a writing I wrote in Secondary 3, when I was still novice at crafting out stories. I got 26/30! In comparison to what the TheoKwek can do now, the difference is vast. He's just Secondary Two! Here's a nice line from his latest poem:

But.
Boys
have never made good
Embroideres,
and neither have
Guns
made good
Needles.

They were right - the world is unfair.

And the interesting part is how we all each try to accept it, and how some of us fight against it. I just realised I've not talked philosophical shit for a long time, and I'm not looking forward to spewing philosophical crap on MSN or even in real-life. I like to see how everyone has their different philosophies towards life, and how they base their lives on these philosophies. Yeah!


Today my dad and I went IKEA to get a new cupboard for me to put all my scores in. So in goes the Baroque Bach things, Classical Beethoven and Mozart, Romantic Chopin Etudes and Liszt Hungarian Dances, Modern Debussy Etudes and of course much more. Dinner there was pretty embarassing - my dad's style of 'bochap people looking at us' and 'as long as we get to eat' mentality is so different from mine. But I felt both stupid and good.

If you know IKEA uses these special tray trollies that can be dragged around. And we couldn't find a table, so we took on of these trollies and started eating at the side. Ok there probably was a grin or two from other diners there because they were thinking how smart we were, or even practical. But man there were smirks and of course sniggers on how we couldn't find a seat ourselves and had to sit at the side.

Well to be honest the tray was pretty comfortable because we were sitting at the side, with our glasses on the platform, and we were just drinking and eating as if it were no one's business.

It wasn't anyone's really!

And I'm sure my mum's around us all the time. Apparently she went into my dad's dreams and told him that there would be no tuition for the month of June, just like she has always done for the past years. So don't pay the fees! So like my mum. Thanks mum!

Tying Shoelaces

Everyone wears shoes. At least everyone living in the fast-paced hub we call Singapore. Wearing shoes is one thing – tying shoelaces together is another. And tying shoelaces, I must say, is something that is equivalent to Singapore winning the World Cup, at least for me.

Since the day I started wearing shoes, the shoes were fitted in and then tied by my mother. This was a scene I always saw, me sitting on the red stool situated outside my house, and my mum kneeling in front of me, fingers as quick as lightning, tying the shoelaces as if she were doing another daily chore, like tying up the entrance of the garbage bag. This went on of years, and soon I could memorize all the steps needed to eat my breakfast, pack up my bag, put on my shoes, and get out of the house.

Except the part where I tie my shoelaces.

My attempts to tie these white strings together were futile, and my inability to tie them together was even more embarrassing.

I remember those times in shopping centres, where those two long pieces of cloth refused to hold on to one another. I had to face two embarrassing moments; the first would be to trip and fall, and the second would be too wait for my mum to tie my shoelaces for me.

And the problem? It was all done in public.

I remember those moments, where upon realizing my laces were loose, I would proceed to shuffle to the nearest toilet or pillar, and repeat the process of failing to tie those shoelaces. I tried many different knots, so many that I think those scouts would have been shamed when they had seen me, all crunched up and sweaty with the attempts, which should have, by then, numbered to a hundred.

That time, I was eleven, a primary school child who saw all his peers tying shoelaces with ease.

It became a personal goal. I chose a day, and decided it would be the day I could simply bend down, move my fingers over those strings, and voila! My shoes would then be smiling at my accomplishment. I would be beaming with joy, those shoelaces finally under my hand, under my control.

I summoned my mother, and in a straight and strict voice I said, "Mum, I am going to learn how to tie my shoelaces by today. If you don't teach me, I shall commit suicide." (In primary school the words 'committing suicide' seemed to be an excellent threat, and it was actually the 'in-thing' in those days)

"Why do you make such a sudden request?"

"Never mind about that, I want you to teach me, otherwise…I'll commit suicide!"

And so the tired mum brought me outside the house and placed me on the same red stool. She took those shoes out again, the very same shoes I vowed that I would someday force into submission. I slipped my feet quietly with anticipation, and prepared myself for the quest I was about to undertake.

"Ok first, you turn the shoelaces like this."

Within seconds, the first part of tying shoelaces was over. Her hands moved with such dexterity that I was able to see nothing but a blur of beige over a patch of white.

"Huh? Huh! Wait I didn't see a single thing! How do you expect me to tie shoelaces! Can you do it again or not?" Fragments of the famed Singaporean-English (also known as Singlish) started to crawl out of my mouth, and this young face was screwed with frustration.

"Ok I shall do it again. If you don't look carefully, I will stop teaching you."

My eyes focused very clearly on the shoelaces, and my brain was throbbing hard. I soon realized that my hands were clutched very tightly against the skin of my lap, and I released them. I readied myself for the sudden movement of beige again.

I blinked. Opening your eyes wide out for a long time hurt. I stared back at my feet, preparing for her second attempt at teaching me the first part of tying shoelaces.

But all I saw was the finished product, the final product. Those shoelaces were already in place, and I could almost hear the smirking of these shoes. When I looked up, my mum had already left for her kitchen, where she would prepare dinner.

"Mum! Why are you leaving so quickly? I have yet to finish learning how to tie my shoelaces!" I sputtered. Controlling one's speech when one was extremely agitated was very difficukt.

"But you clearly didn't want to listen." My mother replied.

"Aren't you afraid I would commit suicide?"

"Go, lah."

I turned my head towards the window, and thinking about what was below had me shuddering.

A few months had passed, and still my fingers never learnt the art of tying my own shoelaces. But I never gave up. Over these few months I would continue trying, with determination enough yet to put the scouts to shame. I would succeed.

I did learn how to tie my shoelaces finally, at the most unlikely place though - it was in Slovenia, Italy, and I was there for a music trip.

I was alone in the hotel room, and I looked at those same pair of shoes. I pulled those shoes towards me as I had done over the past few months. I slipped my feet in, once again with quiet anticipation, ready to undertake this same quest that I had repeated a hundred times previously.

My fingers moved with care and delicateness, working on bringing these two strings together all by myself. I held my breath, going through every step with excitement, and yet fear, fear that I would fail once again, like I had done before. I slipped the final knot in.

And there it was! My heart lifted, and I looked back at my shoes, albeit with shoelaces tied. I did it.

Without anyone's help.

It was one of the best and most precious moments of my short life. Singapore had won the World Cup, and I had tied my shoelaces!

    

A thank-you note

To some person who's not a guy:

You bring to me peace and comfort.
I feel connected to the world when I'm talking to you.
I hope this can last for a long time, not simply months, but years.
You give me respite from this loss, and for that I'm thankful.

It may be what they call a bounce-back.

But as what my piano teacher said yesterday,
don't care about tomorrow, care about today.
And if what happens today is cared for,
tomorrow would be okay.

And it's good now.

Scrubbing Germany's Plucking

The joy of seeing the dirt all gone after scrubbing one's own white pants. So there I was, just continuously scrubbing at the leg end, and seeing the patch lightening in colour.

I'm going to Germany in August! Clarence bought the air ticket for me already, because we (including the imba Zhang Aidi) made it into the competition round. After doing a recording of my Mozart Sonata K.330 1st Movement and my Chopin 'Harp' Etude, I sent it in to the organization and passed the recording round.

So anyway yeah I'm flying off on the 31st of July. It's kinda exciting that someone else bought the air ticket for me, because usually it would be a family-planned thing and we would do the surveys and everything.

This time Clarence smsed me to say 'I got the air ticket for you already.' Cool...

I'm going alone though! :( For the first time in my life I'll be going overseas all alone, without any company, although there's Clarence and Aidi. My dad will stay here in Singapore...And my mum will be around me in spirit :)

It's been a week, and I've coped surprisingly ok, trying to get this into a default setting. There's not much a huge change, except that it's clearer where the laundry goes and how to wash the laundry. Speaking of which I just went to hang up the bamboo poles...

I'll use Vesak Day to do all my overdue homework, so that means no distractions, no MSN. It's useless to say it but don't do it, so I'll be counting on my willpower. Although I demonstrated lousy willpower this morning by not being able to click into consciousness and get out of bed by 6, it will be different on Monday!

Anyway yesterday from 11.30-12.30 and 3.30 to 6.30 I went jamming! And any bass players out there like David, please tell me the correct way of plucking, because if I pluck so quickly my arms tend to tense up, and I'll definitely stop to relax the muscles.

Help, anyone?

peace finally for her

Kk I'm back. Firstly lots of people to thank.

First to top the list would be Jason, my cousin, who was here to help my dad and I in arrangement of the wake, the funeral, and lastly her cremation. And of course he was always there when drinks were needed to be served.

Was pretty busy on the second day though - many visitors came in, including all my NAFA friends, some of my classmates, extended relatives, and some of my mum's friends.

Today was the final day of the wake - there was a service before the cremation in the church. It was overwhelming, but I pretty much had everything organized in my head already, so I unknowingly did not shed a tear.

Thanks to Fiona and Edwyna for being all the way there from the service to the cremation.

The church is a beautiful and good place for inspiration. Must stop taking advantage of the Church to write music.



Thanks to all classmates who came down although there was school! Zhongren, Bryan, Jon Lim, Miss Low, and Mr Tan. Thank you!

Thanks to Mr. Eric Lim, my dad's friend, who bought a book "The Rest Is Noise" on modern art music for me, talking about Debussy and Ravel and the likes. Extremely hard to find a person like him (accompanied Pres. Nathan to South Africa before, owns many companies, and probably owns Mr. Kwan ;) - Sorry ryan!)

Thanks to the 6-5 guys, who really cheered me up when I just saw them. Laughing and talking alot of nonsense as per usual. For goodness Henry please start acting normal. Which wake has a doorbell. In 70 years when you have yours I'll switch off the lights to yours man...See whether got doorbell sound come out..

Thanks to all my relatives, who have been a constant pillar of support for me, and giving some life's invaluable tips.

Thanks to all RISE members, who came down, including Mr Sze, who came for two days. You guys have been a constant reminder for me to stay strong and focused too. Thanks!

Thanks to my neighbours, who also came down to visit my mum and gave words of wisdom.

Thanks to the funeral director, who ensured everything went smoothly and made my mum's journey to heaven smooth.

Thanks to the Church, who provided a safe and holy haven for the wake, a place where we could mourn, a place which was calm and quiet, a peaceful resting place for my mum.

And of course all who came to pay their last respects.

I'll get back soon to the track of life

her final moments

It was pretty overwhelming. I missed The Hypochondraic today as my dad called me to say that my mum was in a critical condition. So both of us rushed to Assisi Hospice, where my mum had been living in for the past few weeks.

In case any of you don't know, she's contracted liver cancer, and by the time she got diagnosed it was already too late. It was at the terminal stage already.

I hadn't caught a glimpse of my mum since last Friday, so today I decided I should again because I would never get to see her again if I missed the chance. I went there earlier this morning (but didn't enter the ward) and I went again this evening at 7.00.

She was lying there, unable to speak a single word. In case any of you don't know why, the liver has stopped functioning, and (I'm not a bio student, but I'll explain it as best as I can) the poisons that are generated by the body are not being expelled out of her body.

As such, the poisons have entered her bloodstream, and slowly impaired her brain and thought.

Now for all of you out there who are reading this, I don't know how you're feeling now, but this is all real. So yes, your friend here is currently facing an impending death in his family.

So when I went into her ward today, she was unable to recognise me, and her breathing was extremely laboured. So I heard the heaving and her laboured breaths - each single breath she took, felt so labouring. Her eyes were flipped upwards, and her eyelids were half-closed. And her skin tightened around her skull.

I talked to her a little, telling her I was Jonathan Shin, her son. If she still did remember - (she can't recognize anyone as of now) - however I'm very sure she lit up, whether she's angry that I came, or that she was happy. My psychologist cousin told me that she was probably having some memories switched on.

I told her loudly that I was Jonathan Shin. And that I was a pianist. And that I was her son. And that she went for my concerts, and she watched me perform. I told her I would work hard and she didn't need to worry.

Of course by then my tears were following already, as of all the relatives who were over there. They were crying, and asking my mum whether she heard me. She was making unintelligible sounds, and she clearly laboured to say something. Well she didn't get to say it though - it was now simply hopeless. Her lips were now chapped and faded - and she could not close her mouth; something like my uncle, who also passed away from liver cancer.

I told her I would work hard and that I would get a proper job. And that she always told me that on Mother's Day she didn't want any presents except that I got good results. I assured her I would - something that I've been trying to so hard to achieve.

I can still remember her face - the painful expression, the inability to recognize anyone, the blank glance. It was completely different from Friday when I saw her. At least she was still able to order and scold my dad around. Today she was entirely weak.

Nearing the last few moments of her life.

There've been many ups-and-downs for our relationship. I wouldn't mention much here - one should learn how to forgive and forget. Someone who was once so decisive and strong, had now become weak and a faint memory. Something so powerful - now lost.

I feel satisfied. I've told her what I would have done.

I feel a little pain though.

Trying to really hang in there, with every single breath she took. Every breath she exhaled a loud heave. Staring into the space, now a movement from a hand, now giving up.

I stroked her hair, and it felt really smooth. I've never stroked my mum's hair - she wouldn't have allowed me to. Well this time I did. It's probably the only time I got to anyway.

I think she teared a little bit. Just a little bit though.

I don't want see my mum suffer anymore. She's had quite a life (some really good points in my life where we shared with each other, and sometimes when I really become a jerk). When she passes away she'll get to somewhere better I hope.

Somewhere where she can breathe freely and taste orange juice.

Somewhere where she can be relieved from all the shit I've been giving her, but where she can watch my concerts somewhere from above.

Somewhere where she is free from worries and troubles.

Thanks mum, for the past 15 years. I'll use what you've taught me to the best I can.

nothing

I've not yet gotten Dr Hecht's comments on my performance on Friday! So don't bother asking yet my viewers.

Anyway not much this week except I went to my aunt's house on Saturday and Sunday and left from there to school the next day. And I mostly played PSP and read my Chinese book. And the Chinese book wasn't for any sort of review! So a milestone for me.

And nothing else to talk about - the plain reason why I failed to blog for the past few days...

a musical day ahead

I had to do an impromptu performance yesterday. With the imba Zhang Aidi, during Studio Class.

I mean, I couldn't believe it! Dr Hecht stated it was from 7-10, but I didn't realize all of us year 1s and year 2s had to perform. So anyway I didn't practise (neither did Aidi) for the half-an-hour between our lessons and Studio Class. And that meant I was looking towards a performing disaster.

Bach was a performing disaster - I didn't even know whether I was in the correct bar, but I was playing all the different progressions until it sounded good enough to head towards the end. But yes, I wasn't even conscious. That was because IT WASN'T MEMORIZED!

And so I was solely concentrating on the notes and not the correct mindset and 'feel'. There you have it, a musical disaster. Mozart was better, and the imagery that Dr Hecht put to me yesterday for a final attempt to help me do well in juries was fantastic enough to make me smile and think about the operatic actions and the laughter. And finally, Chopin etude, which I've already played through a couple of times.

Wish me good luck for juries tomorrow! Meanwhile, I can't wait. I have this immense urge to perform for them now, them being Dr Hecht, Mr Tiu, and the director of the Conservatory, Mr. Bernard Lanskey. After my juries, I would be heading back to school for some jamming, and then soccer, and then REHEARSAL from 6.30 to 9.30pm!

Shiok, shiok, shiok. What a musical day. I'll be skipping school to prepare for my juries though, so anyone from 4L who sees this, please tell the teachers! And if you don't understand what a jury means, it means a performance in front of members of the faculty and they will check one's progress throughout the entire year through the means of one performance.

That's it. Tomorrow I'll show them my progress. However, I wouldn't like to over-estimate, and I will continue practising now!

Detention #2 (NO! A series about detention! It wasn't done on purpose!)

And of course, how could I have forgotten about the touch rugby game played by RJ girls for training in RI?

It was a combination of softball and rugby, where they had to pass the ball around and there was a girl who ran around the bases. And of course, the famous scene, when this pretty RJ girl in uniform (the only one in uniform) ran around the bases, and when she went for a touchdown at the final base, she dived, and lo and behold! her skirt flew over and I saw no evil.

Ok I didn't see any evil, because Norman saw it and told us. NORMAN SAW EVIL. He told me it was white. And when I looked there, obviously the girl had pulled back down her skirt, but she was covering her face in laughter. And all the girls around her collasped into laughter.

Damn. Evil comes only once in a while, and you hardly get to catch it until you're around 30.

Detention #1 (no series planned)

My plan backfired. It wasn't really a 'plan'. It was a I-need-to-eat-my-lunch-NOW case, and so I missed 20 mins of Assembly period to go eat my lunch at RJ. I managed to avoid the prefects doing their rounds at RJC, but when I got back to RI for the Assembly, I met into Miss Goh, and she referred me to Miss Jacqueline Sim, who made me go for detention, and then to Mr. Tan Wen Seng. Good thing was that they didn't shout in my ears, otherwise it would have been unbearable.

So I got one demerit point for truancy - one step to being John Lennon at 16. Or 15. Except I have yet to get laid (which I'm not planning to do so until I'm 30) So unfair really. I've never been to a detention my whole LIFE!

I wouldn't complain it's unfair or anything, because after I told my dad about the detention he said good that I ate my lunch and that I had to take care of my health.

Otherwise it would be Assembly wise Pound foolish. Had I not eaten, I would have FALLEN ILL! :O So for detention I had to write a reflection letter, and tomorrow I would be making a speech with 3 other guys during morning assembly about why one shouldn't pon assembly. Actually being in the process it really isn't meant to humialliate us, just to tell you guys that ponning really sucks. Because when I went for the last few parts of the Humanities quiz, it really was damn fun.

Moral of the story? Always have a heavy breakfast at 5am so you wouldn't have to look like an idiot at 12.30 and run off to RJ to quickly get your stomach filled.

Originally I could have gone home to practise piano at 3, but I got home at 6. I have juries this Saturday. And I have nothing to worry about already. I've gotten over it, and I need to work on my priorities. But yet, I have so limited time to practise. I only have tonight to practise, and none tomorrow before I go for my lessons. And string ensemble rehearsal on Friday is from 6.30 to 9.30. I get back home, practise till 12am. Entirely possible. And then 10am would be my juries. 6 hours to sleep, and 2 to practise, before taking a bus to the Conservatory.

Fine. Settled.

After this Saturday, I'm free. I can compose music. I can read lots of books. Play music with friends.

But concentrate, concentrate on Saturday.

Concentrate on my music.

Spiralling ribbons from the sky

I feel comfortable sitting here in this chair. Air-conditioned, although my legs are tired. Beautiful Prelude in D major. All the brilliant intricacies, intertwining harmonies, suddenly to regret and then to hope. Suddenly to Theophilus-talk.

Listening to Dr Hecht teach Bach is so soothing.

Math Error Analysis was ok. I can say maybe I can get 4/7. For Chemistry, I don't think that would be the case. I feel like drinking water now. Just pure refreshing water. Mountain water. Flowing from above.

Flying over an evergreen forest with snow and sleet. Beauty of nature.
Bach - language of humanity.

Spiralling ribbons from the sky.

I should stop writing like this - they may be to my viewers' displeasure, although it is my pleasure to write like this.

Peace

One day a woman came to see the Buddha (the great spiritual teacher who lived several thousand years ago in India) with her dead child in her arms. Grief-stricken, she had wandered from place to place, asking people for medicine to restore him to life. As a last resort, she asked the Buddha if he could help her. "Yes, he said, "But you must first bring me some mustard seed from a house in which there has never been a death."

Filled with hope, the woman went from door to door inquiring, but no one could help her. Every house she entered had witnessed its share of deaths. By the time she reached the end of the village, she had awakened to the realization that sickness and death are inevitable. After burying her son, she returned to the Buddha for spiritual instruction. "Only one law in the universe never changes," he explained, "that all things change and all things are impermanent." Hearing this, the woman became a disciple and eventually, it is said, attained enlightenment.

All things change and all things are impermanent. I should start embracing both Christianity and Buddhism at once.

I'm at peace. And that is important, for only in mental peace can one achieve his fullest potential. I shall clear away all distractions, and work on my priorities. I shall stop using excuses not to do work, and I shall list all my current priorities.

1. Study for Chemistry CCT, even though it's too late, I shall do my best.
2. Practise Mathematics Differentiation, which I've been doing for the past few days, and I'm confident for tomorrow's quiz.
3. Practise for juries on Saturday. I shall work on my 2nd and 3rd movement of Mozart.
4. Type out my English summary for my speech

I'm still the normal Jonathan Shin, but with clearer priorities. This shall serve as a reminder for me to lead a balanced life. I shall go to church every Sunday, and I will harness the power of meditation to guide me through my toughest times. I would still talk to friends, for I'm not selfish, and I do not strive to better others, only myself.

I shall not let them down - I shall not let him down - I shall not let her down - I shall not let myself down.

I realised I wrote

I shall eat a banana for lunch.

I realised I wrote a modern art-music piece called Tribal Dance for the Land of Hi. It's so damn coincedental that Clinton mentioned to me about him planning to write an abstract work called "Hi", and that we were working towards a musical at the end of the year for the Literature Comedy Project. And our project was supposed to revolve around Gulliver's Travels (I supposed). So if you did read the last book where he met the Yahoos and their tribal behavior, you would understand why the music was so coincedental.

The music itself is pretty awkward - an atonal piece that starts with a mere hint of G minor and alternating time signatures to signify gathering people and the pitterpattering of feet. There's the chief's entrance. Well it could have been inspired by Debussy's Island of Joy, when Clarence went on story-telling mode for the piece.

I shall have a banana for lunch.

Perhaps the banana might console me, and it looked like it could lah. Hopefully.

Abstract

It's important to be both pragmatic yet briliantly optimistic for life. It's important to understand that the only thing that comes with a 100% guarantee in life would be death. Expecting a death is never easy!

I'll constantly remind myself to stay strong, and never let myself go astray...

My juries are next week, and yet I'm not ready for Mozart 2nd and 3rd movement.

Lit presentation on the Theatre of the Abstract was neat - an impromptu performance flows pretty naturally. Clinton and I were pretty organized, and Ms Chew apparently thought we gave a very good dramatization of Endgame. She wants us to put the presentation up on the LitWiki.

Which I've yet to locate :X

Other than that, I'm simply lost these days as to what to blog about. No wonder the lack of tags

What else.

I realised I start every post in nearly the same fashion, or at least I think I do. That's because I've a boring format!

We did the orchestration for the Introduction for Flame of Youth this RE period today. And Bryan and I played for 5 hours.

And...

My mum went back to hospital.

And what else. Hm.

Musical Fun

Jamming is so fun. Today I played for 3 hours with Graham, Joey, Glenn, and singer Yee Xiang. Graham rhythm, Glenn lead, Jonathan bass, Joey drums, YeeXiang singer. We tried Vindicated at first, but it didn't work out well as expected because of the range for Yeexiang. Anyway Daniel's band budged into the room and watched us play for a while - we got some hackles but they softened afterwhile when we really got down to the music.

Then we moved Vindicated two steps down so that we could let Yeexiang reach some of the high notes, but Campus Superstar contestant stepped in and helped us out a little bit. I sang a favourite song of mine - Somewhere only we know, but we didn't continue much of it. I guess Vindicated was the song of the day.

After that it started getting really cool, because we played some blues hillibilly, and walkingbass, and there were really awesome solos from Glenn and Graham. So we were just jumping around and singing/screaming our heads off, thanks to Glenn attempting some of the high notes. Really fantastic, the feel.

Anyway I was being 'sorried' and pitied because I only played oldschool music - I guess I can be a more useful bass player if I had learnt to adjust my ears to the insensitivities of contemporary music. Suddenly music wasn't simply about sensitivity, but all about feelings and emotions.

But suddenly it wasn't - I found out that the sensitivities needed in both contemporary and art music were the same, except only on a different volume scale. There was still a need to maintain how loud the bass was going to be, momentum towards the next phrase, previous harmonies that have to be cleared and evaporated from the environment before one can move on to the next notes - the upbeats that had to be clearly and carefully placed. It is perhaps, more subtle. More difficult to see.

And then there's the issue of code-switching. For me to be able to switch from contemporary and art music would be a skill - a technique to my musical wellbeing - something I can put to good use. But of course, being proficient in everything can mean not being an expert in one.

I still have to develop my piano playing, a never-ending process. And discover new things I can do with the bass, to provide the best sound that the audience would want to hear.

Last but not least, I would like to congratulate the RE team for completing our first phase - composition of piece. We would be working on orchestration, and move to our final phase, that is recording, in the few weeks to come.



Wanted: People who can sing and play an instrument at the same time, can harmonise, loves music from the 1950s - 1990s, all at the same time, in Raffles Institution.

Happy birthday to Mervyn!

Ok. I'm seriously going to get down to blogging.

Anyway today was Mervyn's birthday, and we were of course, celebrating his birthday. But it was SO SPECIAL! He played a Haydn Piano Concerto with Dr. Hecht, and he wrote his own cadenza! Now that's completely cool. I wouldn't want to say now that I could compose a cadenza as well as him, but I don't think it's impossible. For goodness sake, he's only ten, and I probably have five more years of musical experience compared to him.

Well, life's unfair, and I definitely hope all the best to him in his music endeavors!

Ok I'll update somemore.

Mr. Gregory and an Accompaniment concert

Today rocked.

Ok anyway we started with Mr. Sean Gregory's workshop at 11, replacing Dr. Edward's normal theory class on Saturdays. It was pretty cool, since we were doing African rhythms and aesthetic exercises. We clapped in different rhythms, stamped our feet, hit our chests and thighs, and snapped our fingers.

And then we went on to improvisation, where we had different melodies for each section created by him.

Anyway last year he came to do a workshop with the freshmen, and I was totally fascinated by his African tunes and rhythms. We were taught on stage to do a rainsong for the audience last year, and it was beautiful, with all the rich harmonies of African tunes and complex rhythms.

I probably still can remember a little of the melody.

So today we did another song, this time a dinner song from Ghana. So there was the call-and-answer, something that went like - 'yeah, yeah, mo-ba-co ni-wco-shway'. Anyway it was damn funny that I accidently did the harmonization thing, because I actually forgot the starting note for the melody, and coincedentally sang a third higher -.- So much for trying so hard.

Anyway the harmonies were extremely beautiful. I still can remember it now! And I wish we could do it again..."yeah yeah, mo-ba-co ni-wco-shway"...(fades away)

Oh for the raindance thing last year, we had people pitterpattering with the fingers, and others doing different sounds like wind blowing and the singing. And then the haunting melodies and the rhythms and harmoines. Ok. African ROCKS.

After that we finished the workshop, and I went for lunch with Alan. So I ate Subway and he ate chilli-spammed wanton mee, which after finishing he was simply red and sweating like crap. Out came the tissue papers.

After that I went to the library to read on orchestra playing and the Beatles Anthologies, before taking a short nap in the library. I headed home after that. But there was more to come!

Clarence sms-ed me about a concert this evening - 'Everyone needs Accompanying'. Ok no words can describe the amount of fun I had there. Ok firstly Fiona came to watch also (clapclap) so I wasn't going to be soloing there and enjoying the music all by myself. Secondly, I realised my colleagues were so fun! Akkra was singing a lovesong! - Dream a little Dream. It was so funny watching him sing, because of his usual character. I mean, his usual character is quite nice and clean, but when he was singing it was simply terrific. And then Ying Han sang also! Simply cool. Beautiful.

And Debussy's Romance was my favourite classical piece for tonight. Simply because I'm writing one that sounds alike. Sh. Fiona's was Tchaikovsky's Waltz-Scherzo. Du Rui played it! I've seen him around, but he does say hi. Yay.

Then we headed back home, and now I'm here, starving. While some people get to eat fried things mixed together called ngoh hiang/wu xiang. AND fries.

Chedule

Finally I can log on to Blogger. I've been offline so often (shouldn't it be online?) that when I signed in I found cobwebs on my display picture!

Now here's the punchline: Jonathan Shin finally gets caught by pangs of headaches and hopefully not fever! So I thought I was Superman and able to do loads of things at one time. Unfortunately not. Let's take a look at my schedule...

Monday (which has already passed)
-School (7am to 3.15pm)
-CCA (3.30 to 6.30pm)
-YST (7.30 to 9.30pm)
-Shower, Dinner, Composition (10pm to 12am) Oh, and add in Heroes.

Tuesday (which has already ended)
-School (7am to 1.30pm)
-YST (7-9pm)

Wednesday (which has yet to end)
-Schoool (7am to 3.15pm)
-YST (4.30pm to 9pm)

Thursday (which is tomorrow)
-School (7am to 1.30pm)
-MEP (2.15-5.15)
-YST (9 to 11pm)

Friday
-School (7am to 12.30pm)
-YST (2pm-5pm)
-CONCERT (7.30pm-10pm)

Saturday
-YST (11-1pm)

Ah. My schedule for the entire week. Enough to freak you and I and the entire human race. Gruelling but worth it. There's hardly anything worth to type out here anyway. Other than that I screwed up Philosophy and Mathematics. However I did well in English comprehension and Literature Dramatic Recitation. Yay! Full marks for Vocabulary, and in my fantasy world I get one extra mark for getting all correct.

And Dramatic Recitation - 18/20! Cheers to Byap and Norman.

Today's piano lesson was absolutely ZIBEI! After watching Zhang Aidi (who is only Secondary 2) play both Bach and Chopin, while I only played Chopin, I feel so ashamed to be in the room. Sian. Must practise hard but must keep healthy.

So NOW I know why Chopin died so young. Probably must have been practising too much!